I've figured something important out that we've been told all of our lives. It would seem strange to declare that I've figured it out, but by experiencing it first hand.
The brain is a muscle. A very strange muscle.
I am not exercising mine and thus it makes me feel dumb. I am much more stupid for having started working at Zellers. The job is so amazingly mindless that I don't get any practice at all, thus when I get home, I feel more stupid. I need a job that exercises my brain. Maybe one that helps with my body as well since I'm flabby and weak again.
It's difficult to find a job that does those two things, physical exercise is generally considered to be your own responsibility outside of work. Mental exercise during work, and relaxation on your own time.
My problem is I live in the present while terrified of the future. (I used to be haunted by the past as well but I'm getting over that.)
Thus, in the immediate present, relaxation takes over from physical exercise. I'm also afraid of not having enough time to do all the things I want. I'm afraid of routine, but I need a routine that makes me money so that I can live.
I want a job that is traveling all over, with exercise both mental and physical, and doesn't involve shooting people or being shot at.
In an ideal world of course.
Looks like it's time to decide what's really important to me.
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